Stop worrying about other people understanding you. Get in touch with yourself instead. Focus on what makes you happy, what makes your soul feel at peace. You are your biggest commitment, so start loving your flaws, your awkwardness, your weirdness, your intensity, your vulnerability, your everything. Life becomes so much more fulfilling when you are just simply yourself.
The world keeps spinning whether people understand you or not so why not make this next trip around the sun about you. Be you. (Not my words).
Grandpa once said “If you are confident about your views or values, never expect others to certify it”. I was still in my teen days when he said it. He died at the age of 97 before 3 years. I am somehow understanding his words how & why. I talk a lot about building confidence to develop a stronger self-esteem, which can later help in growing self-respect further. Let me explain all in few words;
1- Confident people don’t force their views on others. They don’t force their beliefs on anyone else whether those beliefs are political or religious. They have a clear understanding that these beliefs in choices are personal for everyone. They may stand up for themselves when others oppose, but will never challenge what other people think nor feel the need to tell them that they are wrong.
2- Never compromise your values. Having defined core values is foundational principles to any pursuit in life. Confident people live in alignment with their values and will never compromise themselves what they hold dear. They use these values as they make decisions in both life and work. Even if it means giving up something desirable in the short term. When it comes to confidence one thing is certain, truly confident people always have the upper hand over the doubtful and the skittish. Because they inspire others and they make things happen. Embracing the behaviors of confident people is a great way to increase your odds for success which in turn will lead to more confidence. (Not my words)
Toxic people are not new to life. World is filled with narcissists & liars that we can’t sideline. But that situation becomes often if you don’t set limits & establish boundaries. I would rather say, you must do both for every equation in your life. Let me explain why/how;
Set limits: Complainers and negative people are bad news. They wallow in their problems and they want others to join in so that they can feel better about themselves. People often feel pressure to listen to complainers because they don’t want to be seen as insensitive or rude, but there’s a fine line between lending a sympathetic ear and getting sucked into their negative emotional spiral. You can avoid this by setting limits and distancing yourself when necessary. Just think of it this way; if the complainer were smoking, would you sit there all day inhaling the second-hand smoke? Probably not, you will distance yourself and you should do the same with every person who’s toxic.
Establish boundaries: This is the area where most people tend to sell themselves short, they feel that because they work or live with someone they have no way to control the chaos. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Once you’ve found your way to rise above a person, you’ll begin to find their behavior more predictable and easier to understand. This will equip you to think rationally about when and where you have to put up with them and when you don’t. If you let things happen naturally, you are bound to find yourself constantly broiled in difficult conversations. But if you set boundaries and decide when and where you’ll engage a person, you can control much of the chaos.
Two things in life are really really important, “MEAN WHAT YOU SAY & SAY WHAT YOU MEAN”. Apart from these two, yes there is a fun humour element to life which completely depends on your personality. If you connect to what i am talking about, of course you know most people fuck it at the end somehow.
We all try to hide truth, feelings, certain incidents & tales of own faux pas. Back to those first two important things in life, very few understand it & follow it. Speaking your TRUTH is the most beautiful thing you can do with yourself. Or else there are already enough lame ducks around, never throw words at someone without packing some meaning to it.